Nothing says "I Love You" like...

A TRASH DUMPSTER?!?! I always thought the quintessential act of love was painting on a water tower in John Deere Green, but it seems times have changed and I am simply out of touch with the current trends. Forget flowers, romantic dinners, long talks in front of a fire, and little notes hidden in unexpected places. Just skip to the most romantic gesture of all...spray painting it onto a dumpster in the back of a McDonald's. Somebody hand me a tissue, I'm feeling a little verklempt. I can just see the Hallmark commercial now. So for all of you fellas wanting to send your loved one a special message this holiday season, don't waste a lot of money on expensive gifts. Head on down to Wal-Mart and get some spray paint for about $2.29 and show your woman how much she really means to you. Take her for a nice Big Mac and fries, and as you pull around the drive-through, she's sure to know how much you care. Heck, if it's your anniversary, be sure and Super-Size it!!